Dear Sambag: My Boyfriend and My Dad Are Getting on My Nerves
My boyfriend (24) and I (26) have been going out for the past year now and everything has been going great until a couple weeks ago. I decided to take my boyfriend to meet my family for Thanksgiving last month (I’m Canadian). When we got to my family house, my dad and my boyfriend immediately hit it off. I genuinely don’t think I have ever seen my dad so happy ever since I was born and I was honestly very relieved because my boyfriend is black and for some reason I always thought that my dad was racist so I was really glad when I noticed that he was okay with him.
I feel like it is important to note that I grew up in a family with 3 older sisters and I always knew that I was gay so I turned out to be a bit effeminate but my boyfriend, on the other hand, is super masculine and throughout Thanksgiving. He and my dad were bantering and talking about sports and cars and whatnot and my dad even took him out on a drive in his vintage car when he never let me touch it talkless of riding in the car with him when they came back from the drive. They also continued to make some jokes. And when I went on to listen to the jokes they were making, I noticed that I was the butt of some of their jokes. I even heard my dad say that there is difference between being a homosexual and being a f***got or something and my boyfriend was really laughing out loud and I simply let it all slide because I was kind of happy that they were bonding even though it was at my expense.
Now to my surprise after Thanksgiving my boyfriend and my dad still kept in touch, in fact, they text each other every f**ing day and they even send memes to each other and to top it all off I found out from my mom that my dad has been to my boyfriend’s apartments 3 times since Thanksgiving and a few weeks ago my boyfriend hosted my dad and his friends over at his place to watch college football hen my dad has never ever introduced me to anyone of his friends.
But yesterday was honestly the last straw for me. My boyfriend and I were meant to go out and have dinner and watch a movie and I was waiting for him outside the cinema for an hour. When he finally arrived, he came with my dad; and instead of watching the movie I really wanted to see, they decided to watch another movie. When the movie was over, I thought my boyfriend and I could get to spend some time together. My boyfriend said he had to drop my dad at home….. I’m honestly so pissed off and I don’t even know how to react to any of this.
It’s clear you and your dad don’t share the same interest. Your boyfriend, however, is every single criteria in a son that your dad wants. It’s not like dad doesn’t accept you. He does, except more like the fem son. Your boyfriend however is the son he always wanted.
Maybe your boyfriend really respects and likes your dad as a father figure and your dad has the chance to do traditional “Vater and son things” which is shitty but hey humans are flawed. Your boyfriend is probably just seeking validation from a father figure and you feel inferior because you couldn’t fulfill the typical role of a son. You and your father probably have a lot of talking to do if you want to save that relationship, same for your boyfriend.
But I’ll stop there and let our readers weigh in. Please share your advice in the Comments below.http://sambagblog.com/2017/11/16/dear-sambag-boyfriend-dad-getting-nerves/http://sambagblog.com/gallery/2017/11/dearsamdadbf.jpghttp://sambagblog.com/gallery/2017/11/dearsamdadbf-120x69.jpgDear SambagGay Issues